POST-GAZETTE - Res Publica

Nine for 2009.

by David Trumbull

October 23, 2009

By now I expect you’ve all heard about the “illegal alien” Hallowe’en costume that was pulled from the shelves of many stores after immigrants rights groups protested. It included an orange prison jumpsuit with the words “Illegal Alien,” a fake “Green Card,” and a space alien mask. In this economy I know many of you are looking to save money by eschewing store-bought costumes in favor of inexpensive alternatives for this October 31st. Here are nine for 2009—

9.) ACORN Clients. I understand that the young film-makers who exposed the corruption at “community organizer” ACORN got their pimp and prostitute get-ups on the cheap at a thrift shop.

8.) Physician. The costume is free, just show up at a White House photo-op for supporters of Obama’s socialized medicine plan and the President’s people will give you the white lab coat so you too can be a physician for health care reform.

7.) Narcissus. This character from Greek mythology fell in love with his own reflection in a pool of water and died of hunger rather than leave his beloved. Online vendor has Barack Obama masks for $19.95.

6.) Balloon boy. Am I the only one who thought that “UFO” looked like a “Jiffy Pop” popcorn shaker?

5.) Mayor Menino. Make a card-board cutout replica of an empty desk. Don’t forget the e-mail DELETE button.

4.) Tea Party Attendee (for real). Whatever you’d normally wear. Be prepared to discussion rationally the ruinous tax and borrow policies of the national government with reference to specific provisions of the Constitution that are being abused.

3.) Tea Party Attendee (as portrayed by Democratic politicians and their cheerleaders in the media). White sheet and hood, Nazi swastika. Talk a lot about Obama’s birth certificate. Foam at the mouth.

2.) Nancy Pelosi. Do I really have to spell it out? You know what I mean. And you’ve already got a broom in the closet, so there’s half of the costume.

1.) A Nobel Peace Prize winner. Easy. You don’t have to do anything.

Bonus.) You and a bunch of friends could all go together as an Obama death panel. Now that’s scary!

[David Trumbull is the chairman of the Boston Ward Three Republican Committee. Boston's Ward Three includes the North End, West End, part of Beacon Hill, downtown, waterfront, Chinatown, and part of the South End.]